Monday, September 12, 2011

Come and gone

Kel that is - he came to visit us here in Oxford, but was only here for <48 hr. He arrived Sat late afternoon and I took him to fly out of Memphis today ~1. Great trip, but WAY to short.

On the upside, it was GREAT for David and Saja, and even old, deaf, Hudson, to see Daddy again (and me too, of course). We were only apart for 2.5 weeks, but it felt like forever.

We got a bit of unpacking done this weekend (I had stalled), rearranged some of the rooms and made the new place feel more like 'home'. Mostly, it was just good to spend time with Kel again.

Our anniversary dinner ended up getting rescheduled to Sunday night at the 'Ravine' which is a tucked away place a few miles from the square. I was taken there during my interview trip, and it was a great place to go back with Kel. Our anniversary tradition is to try a new restaurant every year, so this was a good first one for Oxford. Dinner was great, we had a wonderful new babysitter take care of David and enjoyed a special dinner.

It, of course, has been an eventful year and we talked about it all, laughed a lot, cried a bit, and reminisced mainly about our 10th year of marriage, but also talked about the future, both short and long term.

It is a good thing that we talk about the long term - even mundane stuff like redoing the kitchen in the new place - because we are squashing the fear we both have about the long term being questionable.

Truth is we have no idea. This is a weird place to be in with the whole cancer journey - celebrating the (almost) remission, waiting for the other shoe to drop, and a whole hell of a lot of not knowing anything, really.

Is it done? Is there more? How likely is the cure still? What are the options? What can we be doing? Neither of us are good at waiting, or sitting back and doing nothing. Come on, time to do something more! Kel even said (not last night, a while ago), that he wants to do the high dose chemo just to be sure and get it all. Do it now. Not gonna happen, but I get it.

Nothing else to report - back to me and the dogs in this quiet night. Kel called a little while ago, he is back in Tucson and will be back to work tomorrow. We miss him. Being apart sux, but having a nice weekend together falls in the 'Does not suck' category.

I have spent a lot of time tonight reading through posts over the last year, and I decided I need more 'does not suck', so that is my goal. I don't know how often I will post, since we are in hiatus mode, but I will try for at least once a week and will aim for more positive than negative. Aim ....

With love,

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