Monday, May 9, 2011

Central port or bust ...

Today was a bust. Kel was supposed to have his central port put in today to get ready for chemo on Wednesday with a few days of healing in between.

Small problem - they forgot to tell him to stop his blood thinner last week, so no port because the risk of bleeding was too high.

We thought and wondered about the drugs, but the message that was left on your machine specifically said 'if you are on blood thinners, stop taking them the night before". So Kel didn't take them last night, and upon check-in and getting changed for surgery mentioned this to the doc.

Uh oh, that is a problem. No clotting, no procedure. No go.

So, now we wait and try again on Wednesday still trying to start chemo that day. If not ... well, who knows. It will start later, Kel will be frustrated, it will throw off the schedule for those scheduled to come and visit (well, their dates can stay the same, but chemo won't be exactly those times), and this whole thing will just suck even more.

Sorry, I am quite melancholy tonight. Tired from making exams (still working on that), from the semester, from cancer, from nothing quite working like it should. Just ignore me ... this too shall pass.

I am down to handling things day by day. Maybe hour by hour is a better way to describe it. I can't even fathom how tough this is on Kel, although overall he may be handling it better than me most of the time. He just needs something to move forward. We just need progress towards the cure. UGH, I really am a downer tonight!

On the upside, David was good at school, Saja didn't destroy anything (knock on wood), and it was my last night of teaching in A&P (only exams left).

I leave in a few days for a meeting in Rochester, NY - which is where Kel and I met - and will see some friends and family. Unfortunately those are the same days that Kel will be in the hospital for chemo and I don't really want to go, but he is pushing me and my father will come and stay with David and watch Kel in the meantime. It is great to have the help and support of my father, although I hate putting him through taking care of yet another person so soon after my mother.

I am really whiny, aren't I? Sorry.

I will go to the sux section and hold the whining until another day:

Today sux. Lack of communication and instructions sux. Delaying treatment for a stupid error sux. Working until midnight sux a LOT, when the rest of the house has been asleep since 9pm (Kel included), but this too shall pass.

Just hanging on for now, riding the wave of suck until it passes and waiting until I can take a Krav class and punch something, anything, to get some frustration out.

Needing a hug,

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